Audiovisual Commentary from the World Cup...

I'm sorry for all of you that couldn't care less about soccer or the World Cup right now, but besides the NBA finals (Kobe is trying to do everything, Big 3 has become Big 4...not much more to talk about), we are starting to reach a somewhat dead period in sports right now. I'll get to the consequences of conference expansion in college sports once it fully sorts itself out, but presently the process is dominated by no more than a steady stream of conflicting rumors.

So, back to soccer. Hopefully, you were able to see the US-England game at some bar or with some friends. Being in Argentina right now, it was a surreal experience to be surrounded by so many Americans and Brits and experience this emotional-rollercoaster of a game. We all know about the infamous goal:



But there have been many other occurrences that have also been newsworthy. With no huge upsets so far (although Paraguay and Italy tying today was a mild shocker), I've decided to compile various videos and pictures together to paint a picture of some of the highlights. I hope that you'll enjoy it:

First off, we have the somewhat funny-looking (okay, disregard the somewhat) English star Wayne Rooney deciding that he wants to act literally in relieving himself of pent-up feelings after the team's disappointing tie:



Next, we have the talented Andres Iniesta of Spain showing his disdain for the infamous vuvuzelas. Well, after this performance, it's not like he really has a choice.



Warning: The next picture reveals the secret to how Ghana won its' game against Serbia on Sunday (it's actually a Ghanian rap group):



And finally, to add insult to injury, we have what many fans in England actually saw when captain Steven Gerrard scored the goal only four minutes in to give England a 1-0 lead:



I think that all of these images or videos just go to show you nay-sayers that soccer (or futbol, whatever your fancy) can most definitely be entertaining. You just have to relate it to something more personally relevant, like peeing.

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The World Cup in a Nutshell...

Unless y'all have been living under a rock lately, you must have heard some sort of news about this year's World Cup in South Africa. This year's World Cup marked the first time the tournament took place in the continent of Africa, and whether it was the complaints about the new Adidas ball (called the Jabulani, Zulu for "celebrate") unexpectedly changing directions in the air, or a prostitution scandal by top world players, soccer's biggest stage has dominated world news headlines for months.

Games got underway today, with the host nation South Africa kicking off the tourney with a 1-1 draw against Mexico, followed by a 0-0 draw between Uruguay and France. While today's games may not have been the most exhilarating, the tournament promises to get more exciting as the top-level teams begin playing. Without further ado, here's a rundown of what to expect in this first round of games:

Group A:

As evidenced by the games today, this group doesn't have a dominant team, but all four teams are solid squads that have the opportunity to get out of the group and potentially do some damage. It would be nice to see South Africa advance out of the group, but they are the lowest-ranked team in the World Cup, and I don't know about you guys, but both them and Mexico looked to be a step slower than Uruguay and France were in their matchup. France, while someone old, still has plenty of talent with Frank Ribery and Thierry Henry being the big names. Look for them to advance out of the group, and don't be surprised if the team they played today, Uruguay, does the same. Diego Forlan is a talented leader in the midfield, but this team could be hurt by Nicólas Lodeiro's suspension for the next game. Mexico looks to be a little too inexperienced at key positions to make a deep run.

Group B:

This has to be one of the worst groups in the field. Argentina should be an elite team with it's ridiculous surplus of talent, led by the world's best player in Lionel Messi. But they struggled mightily in qualifying, and they never seem to put it together on the big stage. Failing to make it out of the group would be a monumental disappointment, but I can't say I would be completely shocked if it would happen. Greece and South Korea don't have nearly the same amount of talent as Argentina, and I don't expect either to do enough damage to win the group. Maybe South Korea sneaks out of the group on a tie-breaker for second, but the athleticism isn't there. Keep an eye on Nigeria though. They are incredibly athletic, and led by forward Yakubu Aiyegbeni, they have a formidable attack unit that could pose problems for Argentina's somewhat-suspect defensive line. But Argentina, with Messi, Caros Tévez, and Gonzalo Higuaín leading the attack, should be too much to handle for the other three teams, and is the class of the group.

Group C:

This is the USA's group, and this year's squad is as talented as ever and has a very good chance of making it out of the group. It all starts with the huge showdown tomorrow vs. England. Win that, and the US is in prime position to make a deep run in the tournament. Lose, and they face a probable must-win vs. Slovenia to even make it out of the group. No disrespect to Algeria, but they don't have the talent level of the other three teams. England, led by Wayne Rooney, is clearly the favorite here, but it's not hard at all to see the USA and Slovenia being the two teams that advance out of the group. I would feel much more comfortable about the US if speedy Charlie Davies was playing, but with Jozy Altidore and Dempsey leading the charge, I think they will pull through and advance out of the group with England.

Group D:

I'd call this group a little version of Group A. Every team is very good, but there are no elite teams. In most years, Germany would be one of the top contenders, but as soon as they lost their heart and soul in Michael Ballack, their hopes took a big hit. And I might have picked Ghana to take advantage and make a deep run, but they also lost their best player in Michael Essein. Serbia and Australia are talented, and each can make a justified case to having the best current squad. Ultimately, I see Germany, with spectacularly named midfielder Bastian Schweinsteiger and forward Miroslav Klose, moving on. The other three are basically a crapshoot, so I'll go with the African team and pick Ghana. Because we're all rooting for the African teams to do well, right?

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World Cup News and Notes...

You don't have to convince me that soccer (or futbol for the rest of the world) is the world's most popular sport: I have been living in Argentina for the past couple of months and I'm pretty sure that some bathroom stalls have been painted blue and white in support for the team. The team gets more press than the 200 year anniversary of the country's independence, and while at an exhibition game against Canada a week and a half ago, I saw two separate fights break out. Let me repeat that. The fights broke out at an exhibition game against Canada. Not exactly a soccer powerhouse. So yeah, anxiety and anticipation are probably pretty high right now for most soccer-crazed countries in the World Cup. We'll get to an actual preview of the tourney a little bit closer to its' June 11th starting point, but let me just say that the players and the rest of the team are already acquainting themselves quite nicely to being in Johannesberg.

Among some of the more ludicrous demands listed in the article are Brazil pre-ordering cookies and hot chocolate (and then having the New York Times declare that chocolate for the team was outlawed), and demanding that the hotel pool be kept at 32 degrees for the team (Who knew that monitoring the pool's temperature could be such a stressful job?). On the flip side, good call by the Brazilian coach for forbidding any sexual activity on game day. The players should be rested in every sense of the word.

Then you have the New Zealand Team, which has set up golf lessons as a way to unwind. I don't know about if this is a team of avid golfers, but why the hell would you want to get lessons in another sport while you are playing in the biggest tournament in the world? Jeez Louise New Zealand, leave the golfing until after the first-round exit (too harsh?).

But no team has as ridiculous demands as Argentina and their charismatic-is-an-understatement coach/legend Diego Maradona. He is essentially forcing the place that the team is staying at to remodel both of the bathrooms in his room so that they can accommodate two "state-of-the-art bidets". Are you kidding me Diego?! Your having the whole bathroom redone so that you can put in your high-quality butt-wiping machines?! And why the hell do you need two?? Do you substitute bidets like you do soccer players? In addition to Maradona asking for ridiculous personal demands, he has also demanded for the team among other things white walls (again, WTF?), at least three pasta sauces at every dinner, and no fewer than three desserts. Hopefully Maradona knows what he's doing and has ordered these requests because he thinks they will provide an advantage on the field. If they don't, both Argentina and the South African hosting committee will be disappointed that all the hard work was for nothing.

In regards to other countries, I can't fault the Italians for bringing their own pasta, nor the Slovakians for an electric dartboard (getting injured by actual darts would be prettyyy embarrassing). As for the US, they are keeping it classy with authentic poker tables, DVDs, and a whole lot of Gatorade. But. BUT(t). They won't be having any of these bad boys:

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