Is There Anything Charlies Weis Can't Eat?

Following Charlies Weis' sketchy and long overdue departure from the Notre Dame football program, rumors are swirling that Weis will return to the Patriots. Doesn't anyone else think that Charlie should focus on not eating himself to death? I cannot be alone in thinking that this man needs to take a hiatus to get his BMI under control before contemplating employment anywhere. Alternatively, I might suggest Weis would have more success as a professional speed eater. Moreover, if the man can't add up 2,000 calories or beat Syracuse or UConn in football, what is it about Weis that makes him even mildly attractive as a prospective employee.

Correct me if I am wrong, although Brady threw for 13,919 yards in the regular season, completed 61.6 percent of his passes, and won three Super Bowls with Weiss, he has done substantially better since Charlie left. During Charlie's tenure Brady threw an average of 181.5 yards a game and post-Weis he threw 265.8 yards on average a game, including the game during which he tore his ACL on the opening drive.

Finally, it really irks me that Brady would be so supportive of Weis. As Brady himself has pointed out Weis was fully devoted to ND and as a Wolverine I find it unprofessional to fraternize with the enemy unless it is absolutely necessary - aka they are members of your family (which is my excuse).